A gentle starting point

You may understand your difficulties very well — and still find your body reacting as if safety cannot quite be felt yet.

You might recognise some of these experiences:

• understanding your patterns but still reacting with anxiety, shutdown, or hypervigilance

• feeling constantly on alert, exhausted, or disconnected from yourself

• recurring relationship patterns that are difficult to shift

• sleep that never quite settles

• a sense that your system rarely feels safe or settled.

In my work, we pay attention not only to what has happened, but also to how the nervous system learned to respond, how those patterns show up in the present, and how they can gradually begin to change.

Trauma does not always look dramatic. Sometimes it shows up in quieter patterns — chronic tension, high-functioning, people-pleasing, shutdown, poor sleep, dissociation, or a system that rarely feels fully settled. These responses can be easy to overlook, especially when someone is managing to function on the outside.

These responses are not signs of weakness. They are often the mind and body’s way of trying to protect you.

Based in Shinfield, Reading, I offer relational trauma psychotherapy for individuals, couples, and groups, in person and online.

Therapy offers a space where these patterns can soften and change over time.

If some of this resonates, you’re welcome to book a free 20-minute consultation.

We can think together about whether this approach feels like a good fit.

Book a free consultation ›

Therapy begins with the relationship

Research consistently shows that the quality of the therapeutic relationship is one of the strongest predictors of meaningful change.

My work is grounded in relational psychotherapy. This means we explore your experience together — emotionally, psychologically, and in the nervous system — and consider how patterns may have developed over time.

Rather than trying to force change, the work focuses on building safety, stability, and understanding. From there, deeper therapeutic work can unfold at a pace that feels manageable.

When understanding alone does not change the reactions

Even with good insight, the body may still respond automatically with anxiety, shutdown, dissociation, or hypervigilance.

Therapy can help these patterns gradually shift — not by pushing, but by creating the conditions in which the system can begin to feel safer, steadier, and more able to respond differently.

How I work

My approach integrates relational psychotherapy with trauma-informed methods that work with both emotional experience and the nervous system.

Depending on what is most helpful for you, therapy may include:

• Deep Brain Reorienting (DBR) — working with shock and threat responses

• Sensorimotor Psychotherapy — exploring how experience is held in the body

• Parts work and TA ego-state work — understanding inner protective patterns

• EMDR — where appropriate for trauma processing

These approaches are not used as standalone techniques, but as ways of supporting a coherent relational therapeutic process.

Working with the body and nervous system

Trauma and chronic stress can affect how the nervous system regulates itself. This can influence emotional responses, sleep, physical tension, concentration, and the sense of safety in the body.

Sensorimotor Psychotherapy helps us gently explore how experience may be held in bodily sensations, posture, impulses, and patterns of response. Working with these patterns can open space for new responses to emerge, often bringing greater steadiness, flexibility, and safety over time.

Deep Brain Reorienting (DBR) and Sensorimotor Psychotherapy can complement each other in helping us work carefully with shock, threat, and how experience is held in the body and nervous system.

ILF neurofeedback in Reading

In-person stabilisation support for therapy

For some clients, psychotherapy can be supported by ILF neurofeedback, a gentle brain-training approach that helps the brain improve its own self-regulation.

It can be particularly helpful when the nervous system is highly reactive, easily overwhelmed, or struggling to settle into sleep or rest.

ILF neurofeedback is not a separate therapy, but a supportive tool that may be integrated with psychotherapy where clinically appropriate. Sessions are offered in person.

Areas of work

People commonly seek support for:

• trauma and developmental trauma

• anxiety, chronic stress, and hypervigilance

• dissociation or shutdown patterns

• overwhelm or persistent fatigue

• relationship and attachment difficulties

• persistent emotional patterns that feel difficult to shift

• nervous system dysregulation, including patterns of anxiety, low mood, compulsive coping, or overwhelm.

These experiences can look very different from one person to another, but they often share a common thread: the nervous system has had to work hard to adapt.

If some of this sounds familiar, you’re not alone — and change is possible.

Find out more:

• Work with me ›

• About me ›

• Trauma ›

• Help is at hand ›

• ILF neurofeedback (in-person) ›

• Reflections ›

Other ways of working

Alongside individual psychotherapy, I also offer trauma-informed work with couples, groups, and practitioners in supervision.

• Couple psychotherapy, supporting partners to understand patterns that emerge in relationship and to develop new ways of relating

• Group psychotherapy, providing a space where relational patterns can be explored and understood within a supportive group environment

• Clinical supervision, for therapists and practitioners working with trauma and relational processes.

Practicalities

Here are the basics — and if you’re unsure, you can ask in the consultation.

• Individuals aged 16+

• Couples or group work by arrangement

• In person for individuals and couples in Shinfield, Reading, Berkshire

• Online for individuals, couples, and groups via Zoom

• Short-, medium-, and long-term work available.

If you’re considering working together

You don’t need to be certain about starting therapy to get in touch. You’re welcome to book a free 20-minute consultation.

We’ll talk about what you’re hoping for, answer any practical questions (format, timing, fees), and get a sense of whether my approach — and our working relationship — feels like the right fit.

No pressure.

T: 07803 049039 • E: paolo@presentingpast.co.uk

Find out more:

• Words that accompany my work >

Based in Shinfield, Reading, Berkshire, UK, I offer individual and couple psychotherapy in person locally and online throughout the UK and internationally where appropriate. Group psychotherapy is offered online only. ILF neurofeedback is offered in person only.