Counselling and Psychotherapy (Individual)

A balanced life does not always happen by chance

A balanced life does not always happen by chance

During our initial assessment session we discuss what your difficulties are and what are your goals.

Typically we agree an initial period of consultation - 4-6 sessions - during which we can: 

  • explore your difficulties and associated present and past circumstances

  • start developing our working alliance

  • start stimulating the emergence of important unconscious aspects of yourself into awareness.

Deepening of the work typically happens when our working alliance is solid enough to survive the tensions we might experience after we are ready to move to next stage of therapy - moving to this stage could take a very variable period of time.
 
With my guidance and support, during this second stage new important aspects of yourself and about how you relate with others emerge from your unconscious. For some people this can be a challenging experience which we will share and work through together. 
 
As you shift the way you feel and think about yourself and others, and the way you behave with others and towards yourself, you may notice apparently small changes which can in fact have an important transformational impact on your life - they all together contribute to a more authentic, and ultimately
fulfilling, way of being.  Depending on how deeply rooted your issues are, also this stage could take a variable length of time.

The therapeutic process continues up to the point at which you are ready to terminate. It is important from a clinical perspective to spend a few sessions to process the ending of our therapeutic relationship. 
 
If your difficulties are caused by a traumatic experience - no matter if it developed within neglectful or abusive relationship(s) or by something that happened to you -  I provide a psychotherapeutic framework within which we can safely explore the source(s) of your trauma  - even if unknown or unconscious - and we work through it together and at a pace you can tolerate.

I offer individual counselling or psychotherapy face-to-face sessions (preferred) or via video-conference. Sessions are usually held once or twice a week.

Only for clients who contact me via this website, I offer an initial complimentary 20 minute consultation.

W  -  click here for the online contact form

T  -  07803 049 039

E  -  Paolo@presentingpast.co.uk

 

Group Psychotherapy

The power of authentic relationships.

The power of authentic relationships.

Groups are all around each of us – our family, schools, friends, organized activities, work teams. In these environments we grow and develop as human beings.

You meet with others to share problems or concerns, to better understand your own situation, and to learn from and with each other.

Group psychotherapy offers a sandbox where your pre-conscious and unconscious way(s) of relating with others can be safely replayed and processed with the support of a psychotherapist and the valuable contribution of a group. You learn about yourself and how to improve your interpersonal relationships, and also find a forum to express feelings of isolation, depression, anxiety, or else, and find a way of normalising your own experience with yourself and in relation to others. 

Through group members stories, responses to your contributions and my facilitation you become aware of ineffective/unhelpful ways of relating or thinking and, at the same time, will receive authentic, constructive and, ultimately, transformative feedback. 

Being part of a group can bring challenges as well as understanding and emotional containment and support. If you engage with others during the group process, a deep sense of belonging usually develops. Active, open and honest participation to a group provides a normalising and, ultimately, healing experience. Re-creating similarly fulfilling experiences in relationships with other people outside the group becomes then possible.

My main role in the group is to lead and facilitate the group process, to provide a safe and confidential environment, facilitate the emergence of the group unconscious towards which each group member contributes, and, with each and all group members, to work through together the personal and group challenges that emerge. This is a co-created relational experience within which you can work through the limiting aspects of your way of being with others and shift the way you feel/thinking about yourself, it ultimately can enrich your life. 

 I offer Group psychotherapy only face-to-face. Sessions are usually held weekly.

I am organising a new psychotherapy group.

Only for clients who contact me via this website, I offer an initial complimentary 20 minute consultation.

W  -  click here for the online contact form

T  -  07803 049 039

E  -  Paolo@presentingpast.co.uk

 

Couples Counselling

broken hearts  

broken hearts  

In working with couples, my main focus is on the couple (rather than just the individuals). I look for the relational psychodynamics that emerge during sessions in order to uncover the unconscious/pre-conscious mental processes in each of the partners that underpin the psychological games enacted in the couple. These usually result in mutual disappointment/anger/etc. towards the other partner and/or towards oneself.  

Sometimes, exploration of each partner early-life experience might be appropriate to help the couple appreciate the impact of the developmental issues that made each of them behave as they do towards each other.

When the partners have a genuine interest in improving their relationship, moments of meaning can happen and the partners may express again - or sometimes for the first time - a deeper level of genuine intimacy towards each other and feel the healing power of expressing their vulnerability in a safe and confidential environment. Unspoken/previously unknown needs and desires can find their voice and each partner has the opportunity to respond in an more authentic and novel way. 

Mutual respect can develop during sessions, and love and friendship have an opportunity to be re-ignited.

The couple process requires courage, openness and honesty. When, as sometimes happens, the partners realise the impossibility of their relationship, these qualities are vital to approach the situation in an adult and mature manner whilst, with my facilitation, they set the ground for a fair and respectful couple relationship termination process that aims to protect each partner and, where applicable, their children and other dependants after the couple relationship ends or changes in nature e.g. the couple relationship ends and a new relationship starts between partners as effective parents of their children.

I offer Couple Counselling only face-to-face. Sessions are usually held weekly or fortnightly.

Only for clients who contact me via this website, I offer an initial complimentary 20 minute consultation.

W  -  click here for the online contact form

T  -  07803 049 039

E  -  Paolo@presentingpast.co.uk

 

Therapeutic Life-Executive Coaching (1-to-1)

Working TOGETHER towards your goals

Working TOGETHER towards your goals

The experience of being coached can be very empowering. Therapeutic coaching aims to empower your whole self to respond effectively and with Integrity and Authenticity to your intra-personal, inter-personal and work or life challenges.

All the relational aspects that I described above for individual counselling and psychotherapy also apply to coaching.

Coaching is however usually characterised by a shorter duration, it is very goal-oriented and the main emphasis is on helping you shifting the way you think, feel and behave to be more useful for you. Overall it aims to enhance your effectiveness in various aspects of your life.

The starting point of our work will be at a cognitive level with an eye on the emergence of your unconscious and the relational field between us.   

The way I practice Therapeutic Coaching incorporates key elements of psychotherapy and counselling. An opportunity exists during our sessions to shift, even if only to explore a specific issue and/or for a limited amount of time, into a psychotherapeutic approach to get the most out of the coaching process. If you feel uncomfortable about this, you may want to consider that a psychotherapeutic approach can also be very effective to increase the client autonomy by eliciting the emergence of the real self and and the consequent ability for my clients to make congruent life choices. 

I offer Individual coaching face-to-face sessions (preferred) or via video-conference. Sessions are usually held weekly.

Only for clients who contact me via this website, I offer an initial complimentary 20 minute consultation.

W  -  click here for the online contact form

T  -  07803 049 039

E  -  Paolo@presentingpast.co.uk

 

Which one is for me?

Life is easier when you have options 

Life is easier when you have options 

As a general guideline, if you are experiencing a distress that affects your ability to function well-enough in your daily life, Psychotherapeutic Counselling or Psychotherapy is likely to be more appropriate than Coaching. 

In making your choice about which type of service suits you best, you may want to consider that some of my clients attend psychotherapeutic counselling or psychotherapy to develop their Autonomy. 

It is not uncommon for a client who wants to improve the way they experience themselves and their relationships in day-to-day life to start with a coaching/counselling approach and then opt for deeper psychotherapeutic work. This would allow you to uncover early life unconscious decisions that determine the way you think, feel and behave with yourself and within relationships in the present, and eventually work together to change the ones that are no more appropriate or useful.  

At the beginning of therapy some clients tell me how challenging it was for them to find the courage to ask for therapeutic help. This is quite a common understandable feeling which is rooted in the still quite diffused culture-induced belief that attending psychotherapy/counselling means something is wrong with the person looking for help.  Somehow, although with lower intensity,  this also applies to some people who would like to look for coaching. My experience has taught me that looking for counselling or psychotherapy is in fact an indication of healthy parts of an individual or couple that want to realise their potential. Gladly, this trend is being challenged in the mainstream media and, one day hopefully not to far in the future, people will will find asking help for psychological issues as easy as going to their GPs.

Some clients told me that, prior to starting therapy, they resisted their desire to look for therapeutic help because of an internal personal struggle/shame. Working with these clients usually highlights that the struggle is between an archaic part (i.e. unconscious/pre-conscious mental processes) of one's personality which, driven by parental and societal injunctions or shame around mental health, and a younger and usually less accounted for part of one self who craves for a freer, less conditioned, healthy, more spontaneous and autonomous life.  

I respect all aspects of my clients' personalities as they served a valuable purpose at the time of their formation. Alongside this, I also stimulate the potential for a healthier more authentic self. My client and I work together to establish a healthier balance between these parts, and aim for integration of the whole self.

Feel free to contact me to arrange an initial meeting.  

 
If you want to know more about the theoretical principles underpinning my work, please read about the "Relational Transactional Analysis Principles".

 

Only for clients who contact me via this website, I offer an initial complimentary 20 minute consultation.

W  -  click here for the online contact form

T  -  07803 049 039

E  -  Paolo@presentingpast.co.uk